Finding Grace

We all face trials in life and during some of those trials we can't see the light, all we can see is the darkness that consumes us.   We begin to lose hope and our faith begins to get shaky.  Some of us think we can do it alone, some of us begin to cry out to God, while others are just lost and not sure what to do.  We begin to feel alone and afraid because we feel like nobody understands or that God Himself has abandoned us because we don't feel His love or grace. During these times we fail to remember that these are moments we need to trust God the most because our faith is being tested.

It says in James 1:2-5 

"2) Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, 3) knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. 4) And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. 5) But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him."

Many times in my life I felt abandoned, afraid and alone. As a teenager I can recall a few times sitting in my room crying, begging and pleading for God to take me home.  I didn't understand why I had to endure so much pain.  I didn't understand what I did so wrong to be made to feel so unloved.  I didn't understand why nobody wanted me or why the people that said they loved me kept leaving me or hurting me.  All I knew is I didn't want to be here on earth anymore. I didn't want to hurt anymore.  I just wanted to go home.

I would pray to God, but I didn't feel Him.  I didn't see Him and I felt like He abandoned me too.  My faith was shaken, my heart broken and the tears were flowing.  I didn't understand why He wouldn't take me home or why He left me alone . No answers ever came and another wall began to build.  I became angry and felt so alone.

Looking back to those days what I failed to realize is that God was there and never left me.  His light and love surrounded me.  He was comforting me and holding me through it all.  His grace and mercy was with me and all I needed to do was just trust Him and humble myself enough to see His glory.  

In James 4:6 it says:  

" But He gives a greater grace. Therefore it says," GOD IS OPPOSED TO THE PROUD, BUT GIVES GRACE TO THE HUMBLE."

Whatever you are facing today, in this moment,  if you would just humble yourself before the Lord and praise Him during the storm, you will see His grace and mercy.  God hasn't abandoned you, He is building you to endure and for a better purpose He has yet revealed.  He is testing your faith and through it all He is carrying you through:

Footprints in the Sand

One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord.  Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.

In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.  Sometimes there were two sets of footprints, other times there was one only.

This bothered me because I noticed that during the low periods of my life, when I was suffering from anguish, sorrow, or defeat, I could only see one set of footprints, so I said to the Lord,

" You promised me Lord, That if I followed you, you would walk with me always.  But I have noticed that during the most trying periods of my life there has only been one set of footprints in the sand.  Why, when I needed you the most, have you not been there for me?"

The Lord replied, "The years when you have seen only one set of footprints, my child, is when I carried you."

Mary Stevenson, 1936

I love the poem Footprints in the Sand.  It has always reminded me and still does that God is walking with me and carrying me through my most difficult times. So, now when I begin to feel alone, even when I am unable to feel His presence, I trust Him enough to know He is with me.

Please don't allow hurt or anger to consume you  and turn you bitter because you feel alone.  You may not believe it or even see it now, but you do have a greater purpose.   You are not alone.  You can and will get through whatever you are facing. God doesn't turn His back on us, we turn our backs on Him. If you just humble yourself enough you will see His grace and mercy surrounding you and you will know that God is walking with you always. 

"For I know the plans that I have for you,'declares the LORD,' plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope."

Jeremiah 29:11